Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle, a reflection.
I am a no-stranger to what emptiness feels like and what it actually does to me. It obscures my ability to control my own mind which then results to overthinking where I fill my mind with negative affirmations – I have no purpose, my life has no meaning, I am a worthless person, I am a hopeless person, and I am never good enough at anything and to anyone.
But Eckhart Tolle, the writer of the Power of Now, gives me a new perspective on how to look at emptiness. In his book he says, “The essence of all things is emptiness.” Then he further defines emptiness by beautifully putting the words together,
“Space in itself has no existence; it enables everything else to exist.”
One of the two reasons I consider that creates my emptiness is my daily passivity or inactivity.
The schedule of my work as a contractual worker is occasional. In some months, I am working; the rest of the months, I am at home. When at work, job orders and responsibilities seem limitless. But when at home, I almost do nothing and just letting the day come and go. Observably, when I am at home and doing nothing are the typical moments when I feel emptiness starts to consume me.
And the other reason I consider contributory to the emptiness that I feel is when I exclusively keep my life situation or stories, even from people I consider dear to me, just to myself.
This closes the gate of possibility to get fresh insights that can be used when trying to get out of stressful situation, or put me to a deeper self-scrutiny before making life decision. Maybe other people are using effective ways in dealing with their difficult life situation that I could benefit from and help me deal with mine. Or, in making life decision, there are things that I miss to notice that they are the ones who will be able to draw my attention to.
I am trying to do the opposite of the two reasons of my considered possible causes of my emptiness. First, for being passive – I am decluttering my room, watering my plants, cleaning the house, and walking the dog. I am not allowing my mind to assume that there is nothing to do. Apparently, there are.
And for being too secluded – I am sharing with close friends some of my plans, or share my current life situation to them. There was a time when I shared to a friend that I am planning to go back to school for another degree, he told me not to because I am already earning more than enough. And my stay at a university will delay the progress of my career. He asked me, “Is it really important for you to study again?” That took me time to answer. As of yet, it is not that highly important.
Emptiness is when you feel that the core of your very existence is void. You see yourself as a being without meaning, without purpose, and without power.
You are just nothing.
But if you will look at emptiness as an opportunity that can be occupied with anything good, it stops from being an emptiness.
It does not always require a big leap of faith to overcome meaninglessness and purposelessness.
Sometimes, all you need to do is to believe: to believe you can, that you still can; to believe you can, that you can have meaning and purpose; to believe you can, that you can be strong and you can make it through.
It is important to realize that emptiness is a an avenue where your intrinsic value as a human being can emerge from – that you are totally not a worthless person, that you are not a person without a goal. If people will perceive emptiness in a similar way, I believe there would be less people who would dislike their life situation and more people whose life situation will improve by filling their emptiness with what is intuitively essential.
My 2020 goal is to read a book per month; share to people what I learn from, and feel about the book. And for January 2020,the book I read is the Power of Now by Eckhart Toller